Difference

Chapter 13
Difference

Red.

It's a lovely color isn't it?

Lovely.

Beautiful.

Disgusting.

Horrid.

Lovely.

Disgusting.

Beautiful.

Scary.

Pretty.

Things get underhand if you can't handle the world properly.

Humanity.

Inhumanity.

Sanity.

Insanity.

I remember.

I remember everything.

She's better.

I'm nothing.

I'm envious.

I hate this.

I hate this.

Remember me.

I need someone.

Love.

A word in which the definition is unknown to someone like me.

Hate.

The word my world revolves around.

Affection.

A word that I lack.

Jealousy.

It eats at my brain.

It was innocent at first.

Nothing was wrong.

I could only hate from afar.

And then.

Everything.

Changed.

Dramatically.

Things change.

People change.

The hands of time do not stop for you.

I am the same.

I am different.

Seeing as we what we are coming to now . .

We're rather similar aren't we?

We cry.

We love.

We hate.

We die.

That's how life should be.

I know that now.

There wasn't a reason for me to live.

If there isn't a reason for me, why should there be one for you?

WE'RE THE SAME.

EXACTLY THE SAME.

One of us needs to die.

I'll kill you before you kill me.

Vice versa.

As we go on, I realized.

I realized the real meaning.

Let's end it all right now.

"I miss the old times."

We can't say that now.

That voice will never reach you.

Why don't we just kill each other?

Insanity takes over your brain.

"Kill me."

"Why?" she says.

"Isn't that what you wanted." The words escape my lips. Though it is not formed as a question.

It's what we both want.

Once I'm dead, you're dead.

What a pitiful life.

I was jealous of her.

When I was young.

I had a sister.

She was my twin sister.

We were close. We were very close.

Things changed.

We grew up.

We're the same. We're different.

Spinning.

Spiraling.

Out of control.

It happened, but it didn't happen.

Sanity. Insanity.

Complete madness.

Your body acts on it's own and rejects your mind.

Driving me completely insane.

Blood.

Clattering.

Laughing.

Screaming.

I am screaming. She is screaming.

I am laughing, and she is crying.

Blood.

Shall I stain this place in that wonderful color?

A knife drops to the floor, clattering.

A body drops to the floor, sobbing.

A body drops to the floor, silently.

This is how things should be.

Forever.

Forever.

For eternity.

I will love you, my dear dear sister.

Forever…and always.

We will lay in this heap of beautiful color.

Because we are exactly the same.

That girl.

That girl.

If I were to do something, they would compare me to that girl.

It didn't bother me when I was young. I didn't bother me after that. It bothers me now. It bothers me a lot. It was only normal for people to compare siblings, wasn't it? Was it normal for your parents to favor one over the other?

She was better.

Was she better?

She looks down on me, as if she were the queen and I were the servant. She probably laughs at how foolish I am for even trying. She probably laughs at my existence.

I don't like her.

Everyone forgot about it.

About me.

About everything.

Let's forget it all.

There is a difference between us.

I am Black, she is White.

I am the dog, and she is the cat.

I am still a child, and she has grown up.

We are very different.

If I look in the mirror, I see my face. I hate this face so much. I want to look like her again.

If I look in the mirror, I see my hair. The same yellow tone and the same exact length as always. Disappointing.

If I look in the mirror, I see those eyes. I want to keep staring at these eyes. These wonderful…wonderful eyes.

We are different.

I don't like her.

I don't like her at all.

She makes me sick.

I am jealous of her.

I know that too well. We mirror each other perfectly, do we? Who is the reflection, and who is the reality?

I look in the mirror and stare at my reflection. A girl who is only a poor mimic of me. It's quite amusing.

Say,

If I were to speak…

Would you be my echo?

Would you be my shadow?

We are very different.

Is there a reason for someone like me to live?

There's two of us. If one of us died…what would happen?

If I died, she'll die too.

We are the same.

We are different.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Repeat those words over and over.

Replay it like a song in my head.

I hate this.

I hate this loneliness so much.

I hate it.

I hate her.

I hate it.

Sanity.

Insanity.

Equality.

And…

The difference between us.